Uncertain...

I wish I had better news to inform you with but unfortunately nothing has change since I last updated my blog. I called the visa center again today and the emigration papers (EP) still haven't been sent to the embassy in Korea. I have no idea what the hold up is or how their system works. To me is seems that there really isn't any rhyme or reason to how and when things are processed. Bottom line is that it's the last week in February and now I can officially say that February will not be the month that we are going to get our son. With that being said, I'm sad, frustrated, and disappointed.

I wish I wouldn't have been so naive to think that things would happen more quickly than not. I just always pictured that February would be the month that we would be going to Korea. I hate that next week is already going to be March and we still have no further progress. I have decided that I am not going to call the visa center for a while now. I'm so tired of calling obsessively just to be disappointed and frustrated. The call ends up ruining the rest of my day and evening and to be honest I'm really tired of it. I'm tired of always waiting for something and feeling like I have to stop enjoying my life because I am just sitting here waiting for something to happen. I'm trying to remain positive and hopeful but it's so hard to do so and I don't expect anyone to fully understand unless they've been through it themselves. I hate that things are taking longer than I thought they would. I just want Ryan home.

My patience are gone, completely gone at this point. So any one that wants to tell me to "be patient" or to "stay patient", consider this your warning :) I know people are always looking for the right thing to say to me but telling me to be patient certainly doesn't help. It would be like telling a comedian not to tell a joke! Maybe that's not a good analogy but that's all I can think of! I've been patient for a long time now and I'm done!

So, I guess I will sit back and just wait for my phone to ring with our travel call. It could be in a week, 2 weeks, or even another month. At this point, it's really hard to say. The not knowing is the hardest part of this experience! Keep the prayers coming as they are greatly appreciated!